“I feel like he’s the guy I’ve been waiting for my whole life,” said RJ after. On their first date, RJ licked Spencer’s sneakers at the table of the restaurant where they were dining.
I really, really, really wish he was made to explain why he didn’t get a job at Footaction.Īfter a date with a guy whose shoes turned him right the fuck off because they were “gay” (“I do lean more towards, like, the straight, like, jock type of shoes-which I mean basketball, skate, stuff like that,” explained RJ), he seemed to have found his potential other half in Spencer, a tall, pansexual boy that RJ licked the sneakers of and made out with onstage during a club night he was hosting. Speaking of malls, RJ works in one at a sunglass stand. So RJ did-one highlight of the episode was a scene of him cruising the mall for sneakers, though that ended in frustration too (“A rough day at the mall for shoes,” sighed RJ). There were also multiple scenes of sneaker. His extreme frustration with finding a suitable mate was chronicled in last night’s True Life: My Fetish Is Ruining My Life.
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That’s deep, but you gotta persevere and go for what you love. Sometimes I feel like I’m going to die alone with 13 cats and a room full of shoes, said RJ, a 23-year-old resident of Salt Lake City who is obsessed with the look, taste, smell, and feel of men’s sneakers. Do I just lie about it and hope that they’re OK with it later? Do I tell them upfront and they get scared away? Or do I sit here and be single and just twiddle my thumbs and be like, “I like shoes, I hope I can die alone happy”? Nor do you generally get a sense of the existential crisis that a highly specific fetish can ignite.
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There were also multiple scenes of sneaker play, which is not something you see on TV everyday (or ever for that matter). Hats off to all six guys for having a sense of humor and the confidence to shake their money maker.“Sometimes I feel like I’m going to die alone with 13 cats and a room full of shoes,” said RJ, a 23-year-old resident of Salt Lake City who is “obsessed with the look, taste, smell, and feel of men’s sneakers.” His extreme frustration with finding a suitable mate was chronicled in last night’s True Life : My Fetish Is Ruining My Life. The third and final round featured swimwear-tulle sewn to an elastic band-and water guns.Īfter much deliberation, input from the audience, confirmation by tape measure, and an odd 5 minutes where the entire bar suddenly started to smell like feces, the panel of judges named The Delivery Man the winner.
Round two, the talent round, brought out dance numbers, hand made farting sounds, raps, and jokes. Our humble competitors donned satin baby socks sewn to thongs, adorned with bow ties and buttons, and sauntered up and down the bar in front of a crowd of over 100 incredibly supportive audience members. The contestants-Perry Winkle, Sugar Daddy, Rip van Dinkle, Quinette (our French friend), The Delivery Man, and Flo Rider-opened the competition with the evening wear round. Repeat, there are penises in the vicinity and this post is not safe for work.) Six contestants, only five of which made it to the final round (contestant number 6, a tourist from France, got debilitatingly inebriated with his wife and had to bow out), participated in 3 rounds of intense competition for the prized designation and $200. Saturday afternoon, King County Bar in Brooklyn hosted the first annual Smallest Penis in Brooklyn Pageant.
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